Small as an Elephant

Attachment between a parent and child begins before the child is even born and is in many ways shaped by a child’s early years. Jack’s experiences of parenthood have always been unstable, unpredictable, and at times neglectful and abusive. As a result, Jack developed an anxious attachment to his mother, and he reacts with both distress and anger to her frequent absences. Additionally, Jack experiences denial and tells himself that his mother will come back, tells others that she’s just sick, and makes excuses for her leaving. Jack knows that when his mother comes back after leaving, “he’d be so mad, and at the same time so relieved, that he’d start to cry” (21).

Jack needs his mother and wants her there because he loves her, but he’s dismayed that she can’t seem to parent him like other parents do. Jack looks at families like Aiden’s and feels a jealous longing for a life he doesn’t have. He knows that he shouldn’t have to take care of himself but has no way of changing that situation, because he believes that the world is out to separate him from his mother. Jack knows that love isn’t always enough, which is a difficult lesson to learn at any age but is especially hard on a child who needs and deserves unconditional support.