Zami: A New Spelling of My Name

Throughout the text, Lorde searches for home. From when she is a child, her mother indicates to her that New York is not their home and that home is a placeshe has never visited. Her mother and father impress upon young Audre the belief that their home—the country from which they came—is their daughters’ home, a feeling which stays with Audre throughout much of the narrative:

For if we lived correctly and with frugality, looked both ways before crossing the street, then someday we would arrive back in the sweet place, back home. Once home was a far way off, a place I had never been to but knew well out of my mother’s mouth (12).

Lorde’s concept of home is both intangible and unknown to her; rather, it is the word itself which holds power. Lorde associates the word home with food, especially with fruit, and smells. At first, this is associated with her mother and Lorde draws her conclusions about home from the speech and smells of her mother.

As Audre grows and expands her knowledge past that of her mother, her conception of home is similarly expanded. In fact, Audre must leave her mother and her mother’s knowledge behind in order to find her home:“Once home was a long way off, a place I had never been to but knew out of my mother’s mouth.